The realest fake news in America. Satire, parody, and fiction.
Science
A third grader's alternative arithmetic earns federal protection, a teacher earns a suspension, and Appendix C declines to explain itself.
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Top Dispatches
Economy
Two blinks at the opening bell are upgraded from refresh cycle to body language to mandate by lunch.
Campaigns
The podium credits posture, lighting, and proximity to applause for its most presidential stretch yet.
Media
After OpenAI disclosed a model-evaluation incident involving Hugging Face, AI advocates urged unity, healing, and no premature discussion of containment rules.
Media
Three fact-checking organizations issued corrections to their corrections of a Trump tweet, moving the original claim from false to disputed to annoying.
Politics
Marcus Webb reads the files four times and reports that the declassified materials contain almost nothing anyone can use for the original argument.
Health
Diane Polk reviews the annual physical, explains what the numbers do and do not say, and declines to provide the drama requested.
Opinion Desk
Opinion
A former cable anchor looks at the spreadsheet and discovers that the cleanest sentence is also the most irritating one.
Opinion
Prof. Eleanor Watts explains why her model failed, why she still stands by her values, and why the spreadsheet now opens with less hostility.
Opinion
Prof. Eleanor Watts treats the proposed Trump Testament as an executive-power problem, a publishing problem, and an assignment she would like the record to show she resisted.
Opinion
The senior correspondent at large compares presidents, errors, and press habits without raising his voice.
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